Dear destiny Friends,
The constant truth remains that every living being feels things differently, and at the same time, reacts differently to situations.
Much as everyone faces challenges in the journey of time, the individual reaction to each of the challenges ultimately determines the difference. Whether it is failure in relationship, business, health, personal or even professional life, it’s important to note that no one is alone; everyone has a fair share of the challenges of life, but the ultimate difference is how one manages the situation. These challenges can lead to high profile emotions.
In the course of this analysis, however, two powerful forces in the management of emotions or the vicissitudes of life, which are meditation and reflection, will be highlighted.
Emotions are powerful because they can push you to greatness and can also make you make the greatest loss of your life. Let’s think about it for a minute, how many times have people said something they later regretted? How many emotions have been broken because of uncontrolled emotions? How many opportunities have been lost because someone reacted impulsively instead of thinking things through? It should be noted, if you cannot control your emotions, they will control you and when they control you, they will make you weak and easily manipulated.
As we experience life in different dimensions, waves will come, some will be storms, while some will be current. One of the greatest skills one can have is staying calm in the midst of pressure, stressful situations or in the face of adversity, and this is because one is able to train their mind.
Managing emotions is not as easy as it appears. Imagine loving someone and you get hurt by the person. Trust me, it will surely hit you hard, the only time one might not feel so bad is when they don’t really like the person. Managing emotions is like managing human relationships. It’s a skill that needs to be cultivated. The ability to manage people is an uncommon skill. Before you can manage people, one should be able to manage themself. This is because human beings are the most difficult set of people to manage.
One of the most treasured skills any human being can have is building sustainable relationships. Building a solid relationship is like building a house on a solid foundation. One don’t need to be afraid if the house will collapse because the foundation is very strong. In the same way, when friendship has been truly tested and loyalty established, one don’t need to fear if betrayal will set in and if it does, one has to endeavor to manage it well because life happens sometimes.
Training your mind to stay in every situation is like training the muscle, at first it’s difficult because you will feel like reacting immediately, but the ability to stay calm can be a game change which will pay off much more. Imagine being at the gym, you won’t get muscle but overtime you will get muscle when you constantly lift weight. That’s how one trains the mind, overtime, one will grow in maturity.
This process requires patience and consistency. Some days you will succeed, some days, you will fall back to old habits. The key is to keep going. Every time you stay calm instead of reacting, you strengthen your mental discipline, every time you take a deep breath without speaking, you build emotional intelligence, every time you let go of something that is not worth your peace, you take back your emotional power.
Make a firm commitment to train your mind, the next time you feel frustrated. If life throws a challenge at you, step back before reacting. A person who has mastered his emotions has mastered life.
How to manage your emotion
Awareness: Aware is a great way to manage emotions. There are several ways to observe how you feel when somebody says something negative to you. You respond with intelligence. Self and social awareness is a critical tool for emotional intelligence.
Detach from need to always react
When an irrational act comes across your way, you don’t have to respond immediately. Most times we are quick to respond. Maturity teaches one not to respond to everything, learn to be selective on what you react to, and you do this by selecting your battles. This act helps to conserve your power. Sometimes, we allow small disagreements to affect our mindset. Moral: know what worth your time.
It’s instructive to note that you can’t control everything, but you can control yourself. Life happens, so don’t try to control what is out of your hands, that’s basically a waste of energy. The words you tell yourself shape your emotions and your emotions shape your actions. When you take control of your thoughts and actions, you take control of your life.
To manage emotions, we have to stop listening to our emotions and instead make our feelings listen to us because our emotions can be a trap for us. Whether as a man or lady, when you allow your emotions to control, you will become a slave to the person. It’s just like money, most people are slaves to money because they allow money to control them instead of controlling money.
As a man, when you allow anger to take a hold of you, it will cloud your sense of reasoning, and when that happens, one will understand that actions have consequences. In the same way, some ladies are loyal and slave to their feelings. They allow temporary pain to have permanent stain and pain to their life. If only they had applied a little bit of caution and discernment, they would have gotten a different result.
When it comes to managing your emotions, what you focus on, grows. It’s advisable to choose peace over chaos. The calmer you are, the stronger you become. When you feel stress, anger and frustration, your mind will amplify it, but when you focus on solutions, you develop inner strength.
Do you know that in managing your emotions, you can feel angry and act calm. This is the highest of an emotional intelligence a balanced leader can exhibit.
It is instructive to note that we don’t belong to our feelings. Our feelings belong to us. We control how we want to feel, but most times as humans we don’t know the power we have. The feeling of sadness and joy is entirely up to us. We allow circumstances to dictate how we feel, what we fail to understand is that circumstances don’t say who we are, they reveal who we are. For instance, one might have little or no cash, imagine receiving a huge credit alert, it will change one’s attitude. That’s how we allow our emotions to control us.
Let’s switch the scenario to a case where a man has no cash to solve his problems, and some tries to offer him cash through fraudulent means, if he rejects the money, that tells you he’s in charge of his emotions and feelings.
Let’s see another situation where a man trying to talk to a lady, the man might have the resources and appurtenance that comes with wooing a lady, and the lady refuses on the ground that he does not appeal to her. Ordinarily, most ladies will give him to the man’s requests, but for this lady, there are qualities that appeal to her more. That means she’s not a slave to her feelings and emotions.
In conclusion, when you wake up every day, you have the right to tell yourself how you feel or let your feelings control you. You can either feel depressed or speak to the depression and order it to transform into an expression of joy. Trust me when you, it will obey you. Don’t be mastered by your emotions. Instead, master them, and you will matter in life.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
