Dear Destiny Friends,

Life is filled with joy and sorrow. And of course, both balance life.  No one has ever had it all rosy in life. No successful person has ever made it in life without some form of adversity, no matter how minute. When relating to a great person, one of the ways to learn from the person is by asking what mistakes they made in life and what they would have done differently if they had the opportunity of changing the status quo. It is generally stated that when a man has not experienced misfortune, his/her life is missing something.

Adversity is a normal stage in life. We can hardly run from it no matter how we try to avoid it. It still has its own way of navigating through the back door. It can either come through death, failure, betrayal, marriage, business, academics, emotion, misfortune, personal or professional engagement.

Whether we like it or not, we all must experience adversity one day, so the earlier you begin to prepare for it, the better. Even if we don’t pray for it, we have to open our minds to it because according to Sherrilyn Kenyon, sometimes things have to go wrong in order to go right.

Adversity is not that bad as many people see it. It can lead to new opportunities and discoveries. There’s always something to learn from any form of adversity. According to Napoleon Hill “Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed of an equal or greater benefit.

Adversity comes in several forms. It can be in the form of hardship, death of a loved one, accident, marriage challenges, business, or job loss. It could even be physical, psychological or emotional. What’s important is knowing how to manage it.

When people experience adversity, the greatest challenge they face is how to cope. We all have different coping mechanisms. The way a man/woman copes with pain arising from divorce, misfortune, failure, poverty, and disappointment is quite different from another person.

When some people suffer adversity, they tend to give up, commit suicide, or forge ahead. Adversity can be likened to FEAR. Face Everything And Rise or Forget Everything And Run.

Despite the challenges that come with adversity, it also comes with blessings. Below are some of the advantages and benefits of adversity.

Do you know adversity can assist you to discover who you are? Adversity can strengthen you in addition to unleashing your potential. When you go through a form of adversity, you tend to discover some hidden part of you. According to Maya Angelou, “You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, and how you can still come out of it.” Zig Ziglar also stated “Sometimes adversity is what you need to face in order to become successful.

Adversity makes one to be strong: Whatever doesn’t kill you will strengthen you. Adversity can make or mar you. Adversity will make you resilient and determined in the pursuit of your life goals. When you experience challenges in life, it has a way of giving you mental and emotional strength if you can overcome it.

Growth: Adversity can also make you grow. When you experience a serious setback like failure, a rational mind will take time to study the mistakes by going to the drawing board and see how one can learn from it. Benjamin Disraeli was right when said, “there is no education like adversity”.

Adversity promotes empathy. Anyone who has faced hardship tends to express empathy when they see people experiencing a similar phase. One of the ways to know a man is to look at how he reacts to issues of humanity. According to Joseph Wirthlin, “As with the butterfly, adversity is necessary to build character in people.

Adversity changes and shapes one’s perspective to life. You will notice that when a poor man suddenly begins to make money, his tastes, understanding and desires for life tend to change. Adversity will shape your experience and understanding of life due to the information and revelation you may have encountered during the process.

The question we need to ask ourselves is, how do we cope with adversity? To overcome adversity, one must learn to let go of expectations. It is because we think of opportunities and promises that make adversity hit us differently when our needs and desires are not met. It’s always better to prepare for the best and expect the worst.

The second is to change your state of mind. The way you see life determines how life will unfold to you. Did you know, it’s your attitude to life, and not your aptitude that will determine your altitude in life. Whenever you experience adversity, it’s your mindset that will determine how you will overcome it.

You can also overcome adversity with your sense of humor. As fondly stated, laughter is the best medicine, especially for one’s mental health. When you laugh, the hormones triggering stress reactions in your body calm, boosting the effectiveness of your immune system.

Your faith can also play a role in overcoming adversity. Your belief factor works with your mindset and understanding to allay your fears and concerns. It’s imperative to surround yourself with people who have similar positive faith and mindset like you. It will go a long way to addressing your fears and concerns.

In conclusion, adversity is like a knife, when you grasp it by the handle it will serve you well, but when you grasp it by the blade, it will cut you. So, your attitude, and how you see life has a greater part to play in overcoming the adversity that comes with life.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate and creative writer Design Your Destiny and Unleash Your Destiny.  He can be reached via

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Henry Ukazu is a graduate of New York Law School. He is Founder and President at Global Empowerment & Mentoring Initiative. A trained life coach, prolific writer, and passionate youth advocate, he is also a highly sought-after public speaker. He is author of the acclaimed book, “Design Your Destiny- Actualizing Your Birthright to Success.

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